Salted Pretzel Caramel Brownies

There's NOOOO getting around it. I "fudged" this one up!! Get it? :)

This did not go as planned. At all. By any means. Huge mess. Huge disaster but I covered it up like a pro!

When it came time to pour the brownie batter in, you had two options. Parchment paper, or spray. I chose spray because I've never used parchment paper, plus I didn't have any. So I sprayed the crap out of that 8x8.

I'm wishing I had used parchment paper (are you taking notes?) because when it was time to get the brownies out of the pan, I assumed I could just turn them over and they would plop out onto the cooling rack, kind of like a cake does (are you laughing at me??). After all, I sprayed quite a bit beforehand. Did that happen? No. I turned them over and they just stayed in the pan. I gave it a little wiggle. Nothing.

Hm. I was taking most of these to my daycare so I wanted them to look pretty. I didn't want to put the caramel on top and THEN cut them out because the caramel would just be everywhere. Plus I wanted little bit size pieces. So I tried something else...and failed....quite miserably....

Yikes.

Ok, so only about half the brownies got butchered to the point of not being able to gift them. BUT my idea was still a possibility. I thought I would be smart and pour the caramel on top of them while on a rack and still easily cut them. It kinda worked...

Not bad!! Now as far as cutting them into small pieces, well, that just got ugly but I semi accomplished it. They weren't perfect little squares like I had hoped but life isn't perfect, and neither were these.

I wouldn't recommend trying to get small pieces with this recipe. Just doesn't work. As far as taste, it wasn't bad. The salt completely threw my mouth off. It was confused. Pretzels weren't as crunchy as I thought they would be. But give it a shot and see if you can do better!!

Eek.
http://quick-dish.tablespoon.com/2013/04/26/salted-pretzel-caramel-brownies/?nicam4=SocialMedia&nichn4=Pinterest&niseg4=Tablespoon&nicreatID4=Post

Chicken Alfredo Roll-Ups

First of all, does anyone else struggle with cooking lasagna noodles? Am I the only idiot that can't do it without ruining half of them?

With that said, the recipe called for 9 noodles but I put in 11 or 12 because I'm ridiculous and knew I would screw up, which I did. But I ended up having enough whole noodles to make this recipe.

This lady recommends making homemade alfredo sauce. If I had the time or energy, I probably would have but I decided to go with a favorite...Classico. Their alfredo sauce is the bomb. As far as cheese of my choosing, I went with mozarella.

Putting this together was a little bit time consuming, but there were no major mishaps (which is starting to be unfortunate because I'm getting so good at cooking that I have nothing fun to share!!!!), and the cooking time was reasonable.

I served this with cubed and grilled zucchini, seasoned with salt, pepper and garlic powder.

The final verdict? Husband- "This is the best dinner we've had in a while."

Yes, folks. 10 out of 10. This might trump the herb chicken, or maybe tie. This was so so so good. The lady who came up with this recipe deserves a high five!

Give this one a try!!

http://mmmcafe.blogspot.com/2012/01/chicken-alfredo-roll-ups.html

Asparagus Scrambled Eggs with Bacon & Cheese

I'm adding one of my own yummy meals to the blog for today. This recipe is an offshoot of a recipe I have in a "Cook This, Not That" cookbook. I like my version better so that's why I'm sharing it. The ingredient list is simple:

I didn't feel like fitting 8 eggs on the board.

Ingredients:
1 bunch of asparagus
Colby Jack cheese (handful)
8-10 slices of cooked bacon
8 eggs
1 tbsp. butter
salt & pepper to taste


What I love about this meal is that the asparagus adds a nice crunch to the soft eggs and cheese and then the bacon comes in there and just blows your taste buds up!!

1. Add butter to skillet over medium heat. Chop asparagus into 1" pieces and throw (not literally) into the skillet. Season with salt and pepper and cook until semi soft (7-10 minutes).

2. In the meantime, if you're lazy like me, microwave your bacon. Also, put your eggs into a bowl, stir until well mixed then grab a generous handful of cheese and chunk it in the bowl. Stir together. Add more salt and pepper if you're feeling funky.

3. When your bacon is done, cut it up into small pieces, about 1 or 2 inches. Once the asparagus starts to REALLY smell good, dump in your egg/cheese mixture and your bacon. This part cooks fast so be ready, ninja spatula skills on high alert.

If you want variation with this meal, you can substitute ham or salmon for the bacon and try different types of cheeses. The original recipe calls for Feta, and I'll admit that it's pretty good.

So I hope you try and enjoy my creation because Husband and I tore this up this morning!!

Coffee & Roasted Almond Chocolate Bark

My first week of summer was AMAZING!!! There have been pros and cons.

Pros:
- tons of mommy time (if I'm paying for daycare, might as well take him, right?!?)
- kind of get to sleep in
- lots of catching up on DVR & Netflix (holla!)
- clean house
- uninterrupted blogging
- time to sit down and read my book
- toast and coffee in the morning can take however long I want

Cons:
- I started the workout program Insanity (puked on the first day)
- I'm working out
- it hurts
- my fat jiggles so much that I'm pulling out wedgies every two seconds
- it hurts
- I have to get up semi early to get the kid to daycare so I can start before it gets too hot
- it hurts

And worst of all...
- I'M CUTTING BACK ON SWEETS!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
- AND Dr. Pepper. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

But don't worry, I will still be making them, just to make them, but I will take the majority of it to daycare for those girls to eat because I'm sure after you've worked with toddlers all day, sweets are just what they need.

I made this treat before I decided to tackle my rear end and cellulite. If you've ever had chocolate covered espresso beans, then you can imagine what this stuff would taste like. Pure heaven. It was easy enough to make and yes, it tasted good but I have one gripe.

I did it the thickness the recipe said to but it never got hard, it was soft and pliable so it didn't give me the yummy/crunchy effect I was hoping for. Yet, still good. Next time (if there is one), I will make it less thin and maybe freeze it before indulging in it.

Mmmm...
http://www.lovefoodeat.com/coffee-roasted-almond-chocolate-bark/

Asparagus, Pea, and Saffron Risotto (with Shrimp)

Fancy  name!!

I learned about arborio rice. All I learned is that there is rice called arborio. Just fancy shaped rice. Moving on...

Since I don't drink alcohol, I never have wine on hand for recipes that require it and I don't want to go buy a whole bottle of wine when I only need less than a cup. About a month ago, I discovered small bottles of cooking wine!! Did y'all know those existed?! I DIDN'T!!!

I now have bottles of red and white cooking wine and I finally got to use one of them with this recipe. The joys of my life have somehow switched to cooking wine and my child having a hard poop. Hooray for hard poo poo!!

When making this for the first time, it can seem daunting because of all of the directions and the time limits/time frames and what not. Plus there is just a lot going on. It took me about an hour to knock this one out. I don't think it will take as long next time.

There WILL be a next time!! This was delicious!! I gave it a 7.5 out of 10. And I gave my kid's poo a 10 out of 10!!

Under the sea (under the seaaaaa)...
http://www.keyingredient.com/recipes/7856240/asparagus-pea-and-saffron-risotto-with-shrimp/

Ranch Dipped Pork Chops

Another deceiving picture on Pinterest. These pork chops looks so crispy!! They are also captioned as the best pork chops you will ever eat. They obviously haven't tried the crock pot pork chops with ranch.

I did learn something new with this recipe. I learned about roasting racks. In the past, when I've tried to cook breaded anything, it was always soggy on the bottom so I quit making that stuff. I never knew roasting racks existed. GENIUS idea!!!

So I skipped to the store to get a roasting rack. While I was down that aisle, I curled my lips over my teeth, hunched over and was hitting my fingertips together in excitement as I searched for the perfect one!! The only one they had was ghetto but I got it anyway.

All you had to do was mix the dry ingredients, dip the pork chop in ranch, dip it into the mixture and place on the roasting rack.

I cooked them for the time it said but mine were not the least bit crispy. Even though the chops were done, the outside was still a little soggy. What the heck was the roasting rack for then?!?!?!

So they were ok. The chops didn't have much flavor, the only flavor came from the bread mixture. But I had faith in this recipe so I cooked it again a week or so later. I decided to leave them in the oven for about 10 more minutes to get that crispy look and taste.

Second verdict? Bleh. Same results.

Husband thought they were descent and wanted me to keep the recipe but little does he know that I didn't.

OH SNAP!!!!

Chop it up...
http://crazyhorsesghost.hubpages.com/hub/The-Best-Pork-Chop-You-Will-Ever-Taste

Cinnamon Toast the Pioneer Woman Way

Who doesn't love the Pioneer Woman?? I have one of her cook books. And who doesn't LOVE cinnamon toast?

I guess the answer to both of those questions is....me.

When I saw the pictures of the stick of butter, the mounds of sugar and the amount of cinnamon, I really thought I was in for the jackpot of all cinnamon toast. Add the secret ingredient of vanilla, GENIUS!! I can't remember if I added nutmeg or not. I wish I did remember because it might be the reason I hated this so much.

I know what cinnamon toast is supposed to taste like. I'm ok with a little variation but THIS was not the variation. First, the toast was still super soggy. Second, the taste was just waaaaaaaay off. This stuff wasn't even in the realm of cinnamon toast anymore. It was in some other realm called "freaking nasty". Husband wasn't too fond of it either.

If neither of us like it, it's a bust.

Cry me a river of wasted cinnamon and sugar!!!
http://foodiewife-kitchen.blogspot.co.uk/2010/05/cinnamon-toast-pioneer-woman-way.html

Mexican Lasagna

For this recipe, I had to go off the picture. When I went to the original website this picture came from, I couldn't find the recipe.

It looked simple enough. Beef, corn, beans, cheese, rotel, flour tortillas. She must have hired someone to make her picture look super tasty because mine tasted like crap. Barely any flavor and it completely fell apart every time I tried to cut into it.

What a bummer. Total fail.

Any ideas?
http://sugarandspice-celeste.blogspot.com/

Mimosa Sorbet

To celebrate school being out, I decided that Husband and I needed to have a little drinky drink!! If you really know me, and there are a lucky few who do, you would know that I very very VERY rarely drink alcohol.

#1- I hate the taste (usually, I didn't seem to hate it the other night when I had too much of it and my coworkers will forever have text message proof )

#2- I don't handle alcohol well. Guess you could say I'm a "lightweight".

#3- I really embarrass myself. I will end the topic there.

BUT, I thought I would give it another shot because I love orange sherbert and despite my hatred of champagne, I figured it would be tasty.

Here is the picture on Pinterest...

 The caption on Pinterest says "Champagne and orange sorbet, perfect summer mimosa!"

So I said "Ok! Orange sherbert and champagne it is!!", sent Husband to get champagne and after baby went to bed, we started to have a party! Our party consisted of Phase 10.

On my first sip, I hated it. EWWWWWWWWWW!!! Of course Husband was all "YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!" 

Champagne is nasty. I told myself that the melting sherbert would save it. I suffered through for a few minutes but it didn't get any better. Few more minutes, nothing.

I ended up just scooping the sherbert out with my finger and eating it.

Now this is where things get ridiculous. I just went to the link from Pinterest to copy the picture and looked at the website this is on for the first time. There is actually a RECIPE!! What the heck?!?

Here is what I was SUPPOSED to have:

-water
-sugar
-orange marmalade
-orange zest
-orange juice
-lemon juice
-champagne

Nowhere in this recipe is there sherbert. I want to get crunk on whoever captioned this pin because they really screwed me over.

:(
http://www.pbpickles.com/2012/06/mimosa-sorbet-day-9-ice-cream-marathon/

Update

Pinterest is now working for me. I had to uninstall a program called Sendori, which I'd never heard of and somehow got on my computer.

So I will be able to start posting again soon. ALSO...

ONE MORE WEEK OF SCHOOL!!!!!

 Then the blogging is on like Donkey Kong.

DIY Fruit & Veggie Wash

I'm sure this pin has been floating around for a while. I've had it for a long time but never had enough fruit/veggies at one time to try it.




Recently I started eating more fruit and stuff because somewhere along the way, my undies went up two sizes (bummer).

I'll blame it on the kid.

So I went to the store and stocked up on grapes, strawberries, squash, zucchini and some other stuff I can't remember. Either my grocery store has the cleanest freaking fruit EVER or this pin is ridiculous. Here are my results...

Glass 1- water mixture before adding stuff
Glass 2- water mixture after adding stuff

As you can see, the only difference is a minuscule speck of something in glass 2. Based on this experiment, I think my grocery store could have a infinity rule if you drop something you're eating. There's no 5 second rule in their world.

Perhaps it's bogus...
http://www.aprettylifeinthesuburbs.com/2011/06/kitchen-kapers-diy-fruit-veggie-wash.html

Herb Crusted Chicken in Basil Cream Sauce

I'm back! I guess me going out of town was all my computer needed to work again. During my hiatus I grew bacteria in my classroom that came from the students bodies (I am seriously grossed out by it), got a purple sunburn, had some turd bang his door into my sweet ride and give me a smile, wave and a sorry, and I just sat here for 5 minutes and peeled skin off while I waited for my computer to boot up. I guess I'll have to vacuum when I'm done here :(

I believe I have my first 10 out of 10 with this recipe. Husband almost demanded that this be a weekly meal and I basically demanded that if he is going to demand that, that he make it himself. It is no longer demanded once a week but I will be making it at least once a month.

I've had other recipes where I had to pound chicken down yet I still never got them thin enough. I learned from those mistakes and just cut my chicken in half horizontal and pounded those down to slivers. I had to substitute one ingredient but I don't think it mattered. The only bread crumbs I could find were "Italian" but they still worked.

This recipe was fairly easy to make and the second time I made it, I knew what to do and whipped it up super quick. I really wish I was smart enough to come up with stuff like this myself. I would be so proud. Instead I focus my time on figuring out ways to keep my kids hands out of his poop.

Happy Mother's Day!

Duh-lishisssss (yes I know how to spell)
http://hopeandjohnbasher.blogspot.com/2012/05/herb-crusted-chicken-in-basil-cream.html

Pinterest Issues

Anyone else having this issue? Heeeeeeeeeeelp!!

Pinterest isn't working for me. I emailed help and got some random automated response for an issue I'm not even having so who knows what's going on. Hopefully it will start working for me so I can get my recipes to you!!

I think I'm going through withdrawal...

Nestle Crunch Bowls

Want some foreshadowing for this experiment?

“The quietest poetry can be an explosion of joy” – James Broughton

I have no idea who that guy is. His quote just had the word explosion in it. Let me get started.

I LOVE crunch bars. I went through a phase earlier in this school year where I stashed them in my secret compartment in my desk and went to town during my conference. I was then able to focus and get stuff done. Let me clarify that they were MINI crunch bars.

I saved this onto my “Fun looking FOOD!” Pinterest board and thought I would never actually do it because it was too tedious. So instead of attempting it at my house, I opted to do it at my mother in laws house and use all of her utensils.

When I went to the grocery store, I realized I hadn't thoroughly read the directions before buying. I knew I needed crunch bars and balloons. I only bought 4 crunch bars, because I assumed that would be enough. I also bought raspberry sherbert (mmmmmmmmmmmm) and off to mother in laws we go.

Lucky for me, she had a candy thermometer (temperature will be important here) and a double boiler. Her double boiler had holes in the top part so I just put foil over it and solved that problem.

Here we go. I got the water in the boiler hot, but not boiling. I break up my 4 bars and dump them in, then clip the candy thermometer on the side. I completely misread or forgot what I read. Here is what I was supposed to do…

“Do not let the chocolate exceed 110° F. Use a spatula to stir chocolate thoroughly and regularly for about 1 minute or until melted and smooth. Remove the bowl of chocolate and stir in the remaining 1/3 of chopped candy bars. This will lower the temperature of the chocolate. When the chocolate is about 84° F, place back on double boiler or saucepan to raise the temperature of the chocolate back to 86-87° F. Do NOT let the chocolate reach 88° F.”

Here is what I did…

Dumped it all in, melted it, stirred it, kept it on the stove, and let it get to 175 degrees.

Well gee whiz, the chocolate is melted! Time for balloons! My husband’s 80 year old grandma was in the kitchen during this part of the process. She was hanging out with her walker, enjoying a strawberry, just talking away while I start dipping the balloons.

When I dipped the first balloon, it was hard to cover it with chocolate because the chocolate wasn't deep enough. I had to scoop it and try to slather it. It actually didn't work that well. The chocolate kept sliding off. After trying very hard, I was satisfied with the coverage and put it on my cutting board.

I guess you can call that "satisfied"

On to balloon #2. I dipped it in the chocolate and BOOM! There is this loud explosion, the word S--- came from somewhere (I think me) and chocolate went EVERYWHERE. My jaw dropped, I turned around to Granny and she just gave me the biggest WTF look I've ever seen. She said “Well, Jamie, do you know what you’re doing?” and I promptly answered “No.”

I dug the balloon out of the chocolate and dipped balloon #3. I started to slather it when BOOM!! I screamed this time and was blinded by chocolate. Once again, I dared to look back at Granny and she was calling me an idiot with her eyes. When I turned back around, I saw the mess that I had made in my mother in laws kitchen. Chocolate on my shirt, on the microwave above the stove, on the counter, on the stove, on the wall behind the stove on the wall BEHIND me, everywhere. I gave up at this point. I would make do with my one bowl.

I let it freeze for a couple of hours. I was able to let the air out of the balloon without it exploding but as much as I tried to get it out of the chocolate, the bottom just wouldn’t budge and it was stuck. My last attempt at getting the balloon out ended in part of the bowl breaking off. And to add insult to injury, the bowl was stuck on the cutting board.

I tried. I tried really hard. I really need to learn to read directions thoroughly.

I am quite sad about this one...

http://nestleusa.wordpress.com/2012/07/29/nestle-crunch-bowls-with-haagen-dazs-sorbet-sugared-mint-leaves/

Conversation Heart Cheesecake

This was my first attempt making cheesecake and I think I did a darn good job! I had no idea what really went into cheesecake, I just knew it was good. And that I could devour a whole cheesecake myself.

This recipe comes with another poop story. I will just start with the original idea. Here is what I was going for...

How cute are those??

I had to modify a few things. First off, I wasn't going to special order heart molds. I wasn't THAT serious about this recipe. Instead, I went to hobby lobby and got flower molds. Same thing.

Making the recipe was super easy and super tasty. I could have eaten all the graham crackers/melted butter in one mouthful. MMMMMM. Following directions was easy so I put the crust in and topped with different colored fillings.

You were supposed to have a roasting rack to "bathe" the cheesecake mold in and I didn't have one of those so instead I just put my mold into a glass casserole dish and poured boiling water in  until the water was halfway up the mold. It sounded like it would work to me.

And it worked!! I was proud. This lady said that the easiest way to get the cheesecakes out of the mold is to freeze them for a few hours. Nice and frozen. Makes sense. So of course, after only one hour, I got them out.

Now. I took the mold out and carefully started getting the cheesecakes out, one by one. I took my sweet time so that I didn't break or deform anything. Things were going great...

I hadn't written on them at this point. This would come later but as you see, the writing was easy. After I got the purple cheesecake out, I started on the pink one when I heard this loud cry for help across the house.

I dropped what I was doing, got that instinctual pose where you bend your legs, put your arms out, get in a crouching ninja position, look back and forth and think "What do I do?! What do I do?!". You know that awkward moment? That was me. So I ran to where the cries were coming from, not knowing what to expect. I see Husband holding baby in the air, naked from the waist down (because he tore off his diaper during nap), poop in the crib, poop running down his leg, poop coming out of his butt, poop everywhere. I then assume the "What do I do?!" pose and in my best soldier voice yelled "BATHTUB!!"

We got him in the bath and all cleaned up, got the poopy crib stuff pulled up and replaced and then I was able to get back to my cheesecakes. It had been a good 20 minutes. Back to the pink...

Can you tell when "the poop" happened? They sat out too long and got soft. This is the point I decided to go ahead and write my conversation words.

Despite the mess, they tasted delicious!! Husband polished them off quickly.

I learned a few things.

1. Freeze them for more than an hour JUST in case of a poop accident.
2. Freeze them for more than an hour because that's what she said and she knows what she's talking about.
3. If there is emergency,  put the cheesecake back in the freezer FIRST! Then proceed to said emergency.
4. I learned that this cheesecake recipe is yummy.

If there are typos, my bad. Baby is all over me and I can't proofread. I'm not illiterate. I pwomise.

Worth a shot!
http://www.recipebyphoto.com/conversation-heart-cheesecake/

Ranch House Crock Pot Pork Chops With Parmesan Mashed Potatoes

With a title like that, you can't really go wrong.

Or can you? Depends on if you follow the recipe...

I only messed up a little bit. Twice actually. It happens to the best of us. It's hard to concentrate when baby is pulling on my leg "MAMA!!!MAMA!!!" as I'm trying to read the recipe and saying "Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat?!?!"

When I went to the store for pork chops, the store was having a buy one get one free sale. So I bought a total of 16 pork chops for about $10. SWEET! My recipe called for 6. When it was time to start this recipe, I took my first 4 pack out, put them in the crock pot and I guess got distracted. Mickey Mouse Clubhouse was on so I probably stopped to do the hot dog dance with baby and lost my train of thought.

I got a bowl and mixed my cream of chicken soup and ranch and then poured them over my 4 pork chops. I still hadn't figured out I was lacking a few pig parts. You know, I really wish I could be a vegetarian because I hate that an animal had to die for me to eat, but meat is just so good. So moving on...

I turned the crock pot to high and dealt with a cranky kid with his hands down his pants for a few hours. When it was time to cut the potatoes, I was singing that "head and shoulders, knees and toes" song in JAPANESE in my head. Thank you fancy app... atama, kata, hiza, ashi..hiza ashi....atama, kata, hiza, ashi....hiza ashiiiiii....la la la la, I can't pronounce the words, atama, kata, hiza, ashiiiiii, HIZA ASHI!!!

So in doing so, I forgot to peel the stupid potatoes. Oh well, right? Right. After mashing them, and adding all the necessary ingredients, they tasted sooooo yummy.

When everything was good to go, I started the chef creation I saw in the picture on Pinterest. I plopped the potatoes down, slapped the pork chop on top and slathered sauce on top. Add some strawberries on the side and this dinner is ready...

Top 10 best dinners EVER!!! This was so dang tasty.

Next time, I will be adding another can of soup because there just wasn't enough leftover sauce to go around. I'll also probably actually make 6 pork chops too.



Yeah baby!!
http://realmomkitchen.com/287/ranch-house-crock-pot-pork-chops-with-parmesan-mashed-potatoes/

Low Carb Stuffed Peppers

I have officially decided I want to start eating healthier. All these oreos and oatmeal cream pies and dr. peppers and cheetos (and I mean cheeeeetooooooos) and fast food have made me feel a bit blah and my thighs are now touching, which is my breaking point.

When I actually have the time and energy to work out this summer, I plan on starting Insanity. "Plan" being the key word. I might do one motion, huff and puff for a few minutes and then try something else, but I "plan" on doing it.

I've also started up with choosemyplate.gov that helps you stay on track with what you need to eat everyday and types of foods that are good for you, etc. all while on a descent budget. We'll see how that goes.

So since I'm on the topic of healthy eating, I tried this delight of a recipe. It looked dang good even though I hate turkey. Every time I think of turkey, I think of this video. Makes me laugh out loud every time.

The recipe seemed simple enough and was easy to put together. It cooked just like the directions said it would but when all was said and done, there was a huge puddle of juice in each pepper and in the pan. What I would probably do next time (which there WILL be a next time since Husband liked it) would be to put the pepper on a wire rack on top of a cookie sheet. Also I would poke a few small holes in the bottom with toothpicks to let it drain during cooking.

In the end, to me, they were hard to eat and I didn't really like them. As soon as you take your knife to cut a piece off, another piece falls apart and then the piece you try to stab with your fork falls apart. So you have two differing opinions to go off of. Although, I would trust me if I were you...

I'll have taco bell next time...
http://martinfamilymoments.blogspot.com/2012/09/low-carb-stuffed-peppers.html

Brown Butter Snickerdoodle Cookies

I made these a few weeks ago and I'm just now coming down from the sugar high after eating most of them all on my own.

When first hopping over to this link, I was irritated with all the pictures and the claims that they were so good before even getting to the recipe. Now I understand. I TOTALLY understand.

If these are not the best cookies in the world, then they are a close second. I make extremely tasty regular snickerdoodle cookies but after eating about 12 of these, I realized that these might trump MY cookies.

I took some to work the next day. First, I need to say that teachers can throw some goodies back. Our jobs are demanding all day, so any break we get, we need something to de-stress. These cookies were it. I ate 3/4 of the cookies at home and took the remaining 1/4 to school and they got finished off pretty quick.

I very highly recommend you try these. Don't be scared off by the amount of butter you will see. Your thighs will thank you one day.

Oh yes.
http://www.ambitiouskitchen.com/2012/10/brown-butter-snickerdoodle-cookies/

Gluten Free Vanilla Cinnamon Muffins

Prepare yourself for a story...

First off, I don't do gluten free. Ever. I eat what I want. And when that starts showing, I guess I will be going gluten free. Anyway, what sold me was the "vanilla cinnamon muffin" part.

I was planning on cooking this last weekend for breakfast but Ma was in town and said the magic word. "Donuts?". YES PLEASE!!

So now it's this weekend. I figured one of these mornings would be good to make my muffins.

At 6:00 this morning, I hear baby crying and gagging. I go in and get knocked down by this overwhelming stench of poo. He's still on his stomach, just squirming, coughing and gagging with his hand in the air. I grab his hand and feel this warm, mushy stuff. Yep. Poop. I suppose he was hungry already because it was in AND around his mouth. I'm assuming this started the gagging and coughing.

So I yell in the monitor that I need serious help. So Husband comes in, armed with an arsenal of wipes and wipes down poor baby. It's bath time, even though it's 6 in the morning. He's so mad (and his breath is just flat out gross) that he won't get in. He is trying to crawl out. I sacrifice myself and say "Want mommy to get in with you?" and I do.

Bath time goes great. Get all the poo off, wash him, he smells like roses so we get out. I put his diaper on and let him run around half naked and not even 5 minutes later I smell it again. He's pooped again and it was enough for 3 people.

Ok, so I get him changed again and decide to put clothes on him. I get him a dry bowl of lucky charms, sit down in the chair, get him on my lap and he starts throwing a massive fit and kicks the bowl of lucky charms into the air. Not long after, he ran up on me and bit my foot.

Great. I'm thinking that when I pick up the mess and get him calm, I will make my muffins. But calm never came so I just threw in some cinnamon rolls. While they were cooking, I made him eggs. When the cinnamon rolls were done, I put his eggs and a cinnamon roll on a plate and he sat at his table and ate like a big boy.

Now it was my turn to eat. It had been a long morning already and it was only 7. Right after I sit down and dig in, he gets out of his chair, comes over to me and once again, I smell it. Rancid. So I sit down my cinnamon rolls on the end table and go get a diaper. I lay him down on the ottoman and this time, he has overflowed his diaper. He was starting to squirm while I was taking it off and reaching down to grab a handful. In a panic, I put the diaper on the end table. Guess what spilled out of the diaper onto my cinnamon rolls? Yep, you guessed it. Poop.

My breakfast was ruined. But the good news is that baby seemed happier. I guess my only option now is to make the muffins.

So NOW shall I get to how the muffins went down?

When buying ingredients, I just looked at what was needed, not the portions I would be using. As I gathered everything and started on the directions, I got baffled right off the bat. I was supposed to whip the egg whites and honey until they formed "stiff peaks". I got my mini whisk out and whipped and whipped and there were no peaks. Later in the directions, it says "mixer" so I went ahead and threw them in my mixer and turned it on 6. It was going and going and going and going and going and no peaks ever formed. So as of right now, I still have no idea how to get "peaks" with egg whites.

In the mean time, I started to mix together the other ingredients. This is where the portions concerned me. 2 egg yolks, 2 tbsp coconut oil (which is like lard by the way), 1 tsp vanilla, 1 tsp cinnamon and only 2 tbsp of flour.

Surely that can't be right. That's only a few teaspoons and tablespoons for an entire recipe. The recipe said up top that it serves 3.

But I keep going. My mixer has been going this whole time but all there are is bubbles. I add the second mixture and let it mix. While it's mixing, I read the rest of the directions.

#7- fill 3 cupcake liners to the top.

Just three? WHAT IS GOING ON!!! I notice in my mixer that there really isn't much mix at all and that this lady is serious about only using 3 muffin liners. But I do it. And sure enough, there's only enough batter for 3 muffins.

So yeah, this recipe does serve 3 people. It serves 3 people ONE    MUFFIN    EACH! What the...

In the end, they looked like crap, they tasted WORSE than crap, they had the consistency of meatloaf, and I'm still hungry.

More like decency free...
http://ditchthewheat.com/gluten-free-vanilla-cinnamon-muffins/

Fruity Pebbles Crispy Treats

I went back to my childhood with these treats (even though I never had them in my childhood...) and it was awesome!

SOMEBODY (Husband) saw that these were on the menu and didn't even wait for me to get to them, he just busted everything out and started making them himself. Upon witnessing this, I became terrified because as awesome as Husband is, his cooking abilities are still in the infant stage....(love you Husband)

But he actually did alright and refused some of my suggestions which turned out to be a good idea. I would have ruined it had he done what I said. I didn't read the directions, he did, so he was shooting me down left and right with " it SAID...". Oh :)

These taste just like you can imagine they would. YUMMY!! Your kids will love you if you make these. If they are teenagers, they will probably still hate you, but will eat them none the less.

Taste the rainbow
http://www.doughcookie.com/2010/09/best-rice-krispy-treats-fruity-pebbles.html