Tuesday, November 6, 2012

Country Club Chicken

I could type a novel over here about my experience with this recipe but let me sum it up then try to explain a bit...

It took so long that by the time I was done, I was so pissed off and tired that I didn't even have the energy to eat it so I went to bed without dinner. Well, I had some rolls.

My first problem is that I read the directions ONE time, paraphrased them in my head, somehow switched the order of them and just flat out screwed up.

I saw that I needed spaghetti noodles so what was the first thing I did? Put the stupid noodles on. After mincing my garlic and apple, I was slicing whole mushrooms when my idiot light bulb went off and I chastised myself for not buying mushrooms that were already sliced. I was irritated by this fact and the fact that baby was clinging all over my legs, tripping himself and whining nonstop.

After cooking the onion/apple/mushroom mix, I added the wine and soup. This smelled like some cheap, dollar store cherry candy and I was really turned off but hoped the cheese would help. I bought fancy NY sharp cheddar but once I added that, the smell graduated to smelling like a truly dirty dog fart and I just about threw up in my mouth and sent the husband to taco bell.

At this point, I decided to look at the directions again and realized I didn't sprinkle the chicken with salt and pepper OR brown it in the skillet that was now filled with a soupy soup. This REALLY irritated me so I had to scoop that soup out and fix up my stupid chicken so I could freaking brown it. I put the chicken in the casserole dish and poured the stinky junk on top. I also decided to pop my rolls in too because the chicken was supposed to take 25-30 minutes.

I was pushing 35-40 minutes by this point. Who knows how. In the mean time, I relaxed a bit, picked up a bit and when the time was up, I checked the chicken. Totally raw. My irritation level was EXTREMELY high by this point. I realized I started my noodles at the wrong time so they would probably be ruined by the end and my rolls were now done. I guess I bought the most obese chicken on the market.

So we just had to wait for the chicken to cook. During our wait, I bathed a child, went ahead and ate my rolls, rescued a stray cat with a ladder, we lost a fossil fuel, and my cheeks were sunken in from starvation. But was the chicken done an HOUR later? No. By now I was really really really really really really irritated. I was at the 2 hour mark from when I started this STUPID recipe.

I was tired, cranky, irritated, hungry and then I looked at my noodles and most of them were nice and crisp. Nothing like air drying noodles for an hour and a half.

So when the chicken was finally done, husband ate it and I just left the kitchen. He said it was good but I was too mad at this recipe to even take a picture. So I really have no useful review for you.

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